The word “happy” goes hand in hand with the holidays like “jingle” and “bells”…in theory. In reality, many experience a seasonal lull in their mood in the holiday months; mainly in November and December but some all the way through to February. For some it’s a mere feeling of a blah mood, but for others it can be full blown depression. There may be no way to avoid a shift in emotions during the holidays, but there are ways to lessen the severity and/or duration. Any method can have benefits while others will not. Either way, each will be case to case and subject to the individual’s specific situation.
The biggest trigger for feelings of sadness, is loneliness. That loneliness is amplified during holidays that typify “family time,” for those whom family is an abstract. Either lost loved ones, lost loves or inability to connect—tensions, physical distance, etc.—make the oncoming holidays hasten feelings of dread rather than good tidings.
For those who have lost a spouse or significant other, there are several other ways to stave off the holiday blues and maybe even squash them for good, including:
- Begin a new tradition. Plan a family outing or vacation instead of spending the holidays at home. (Make it honor of that lost loved one…R.I.P. Granny Road trip.)
- Don't succumb to holiday pressures. Feel free to leave an event if you aren't comfortable and be willing to tell others, "I'm not up for this right now."
- Volunteer. Work at a soup kitchen, organize a gift drive or simply help the neighbor dig the snow out of his driveway. Remind yourself that things could be worse, you have a purpose, or just that you don’t have to be lonely because there are people who need you!)
- Get back to nature. Going for a walk in the park or the woods helps many people who are feeling overwhelmed to feel better. There’s this psychological term called the Stendhal Effect that describes a syndrome where people feel faint or dizzy, even have hallucinations when viewing/experiencing beautiful works of art. It is also used to describe the feelings of warmth and euphoria when experiencing nature. Deep, huh? Worth a try!
You make think you’re alone, but you’re not. Many people have feelings of sadness at times when it seems like everyone else is happy and surrounded by love. Everything is not always what it seems. A smile is a clever way to hide hurt that you can’t share, or maybe can’t even face yourself. The key, for anyone, to not letting the sadness overtake you, is admitting that it’s there and then finding your own way to deal. If your feelings of sadness during the holidays are accompanied by suicidal thoughts, call 911, immediately proceed to a hospital emergency room, or contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255).
Remember, your current situation does not have to be your final destination. The warmth, love, and togetherness that you may long for, might be what you need to give someone else, to receive it in return. Then…BOOM, in the words of Pharrell, you too can be HAPPY! (Admit it, you just sang that word in your head, didn’t you?)
